Today is 27 April.
On 27 May I will be leaving Nantes, perhaps for the last time.
A month separates the 2 and stretches before me, endless.
But do I want the end? I sometimes feel like I've outgrown this city like I have outgrown my favorite button-down shirt. But there are days when I forget this and I almost feel like if I lived here long enough I could come to enjoy being in Nantes.
This is a dangerous feeling.
I have felt this same feeling in Richmond: the illusion of contentment. Realizing that feeling exists even here has filled me with this sudden dread.
No, what I want is that quiet contentment - the kind I always find after finishing a good book, drinking a wonderful cup of tea, or repotting a plant. Little moments where the world is perfect and nothing else matters.
I will not settle for less.
On 27 May I will be leaving Nantes, perhaps for the last time.
A month separates the 2 and stretches before me, endless.
But do I want the end? I sometimes feel like I've outgrown this city like I have outgrown my favorite button-down shirt. But there are days when I forget this and I almost feel like if I lived here long enough I could come to enjoy being in Nantes.
This is a dangerous feeling.
I have felt this same feeling in Richmond: the illusion of contentment. Realizing that feeling exists even here has filled me with this sudden dread.
No, what I want is that quiet contentment - the kind I always find after finishing a good book, drinking a wonderful cup of tea, or repotting a plant. Little moments where the world is perfect and nothing else matters.
I will not settle for less.
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